I recently had a wonderful lesson taught to me by the Lord Himself. I have been at my grandparents place with lot of relatives and folk staying together. Being the only person to be able to drive the car, I was being constantly, pushed around to go to places for buying stuff. Also at times going up and down the house to get something or when called for some work. After doing this for the last three days, yesterday, I wanted to spend time in the morning by myself and hid myself in one of the rooms and was relaxing. My dad, who has been also with us, insisted on visiting a temple. Since he is not allowed to drive, and knowing my state of mind, he made plans to go by himself. Upon knowing of his plans, my grandmother, called me aside and asked me to take him, since, he was unwell and it better if someone accompanied him. Reluctantly and with a little anguish, I got ready, pulled the car out of the driveway and headed out. Incidentally, this time of the year, due to a certain astrological conditions, the temples in India are closed earlier than usual, so I made haste to reach the temple my dad wanted to visit. It is a Lord Venkateshwara temple, maintained in the most traditional ways. As soon as we reached there, we saw the doors being closed. My dad hurried out of the car shouting, forgetting even to close the car door, asking the gatekeeper to hold on and pushed the door open and went in. His aunt followed him to make sure he was well. As they went in, stretched out and closed the other door and I headed toward the parking space to park the car. I saw a group of toddlers entering the temple, so I ran toward the gate. Just as I reached there, the keeper bolted the gate and after much effort and hitting he opened the door and said “Apologies sir! You cannot enter now the temple is closed.” I requested him telling my dad was inside. But he would not budge. Reluctantly I walked back toward the car and sat in silence just absorbing the day’s events thus far. The inner voice spoke asking me, “You did not even want to go, then why are you unhappy at your current situation?”
The truth is that I am still coming to terms with my dad’s certain untimely, at times stubborn and sometimes idiosyncratic desires. Having said that, his desires are more often than not very simple and almost child-like and so is his strong will to have them. The scriptures spell out,
Matrudevobhava = respect your mother because she is verily God
Pitrudevobhava = respect your father because he is verily God
Aacharyadevobhava = respect your teacher because he/she is verily God
Atithidevobhava = respect the guest because he/she is verily God.
That day the Lord Himself, showed that my defiance toward my dad was infact a defiance against Him. When my desire to fulfill bodily comforts were rendered fruitless, the anger that appeared made the mind unreceptive. As this wisdom dawned on me, through the Grace of this experience, I noticed how the desires play in the field of the mind. When needed, they create a fiery passion, causing extreme aggression with the mind jostling to receive the (temporary) satisfaction of their completion. When left unfulfilled they revert back as either anger or disappointment (or depression). The sudden and unexpected shutout by the Lord opened the mind to the intellect to understand this play. I feel indeed blessed that I was able to listen to the Lord for those few seconds and now able to share with everyone. SAIRAM!